How to find your inner passion

2013 - Find your inner passion

“We must act out passion before we can feel it” – Jean-Paul Sartre

Every year in February, there is a lot of focus on relationships, partners, finding your soulmate, sex, hearts and flowers, the color red and chocolate.

As with New Year’s Day (and Resolutions), I seem to find myself resistant to a celebration that has been hijacked by commercialism and someone else’s idea of what passion, romance and intimacy mean.

I asked myself what all of that means to me, then gave myself space to think on it. The one recurring theme that I keep coming back to is that all of those things have to begin from within. Commercialism and media like to show us how broken we are and that we have to solve our problems from outside of us with the perfect pair of skinny jeans, the perfect hair color, the magic blue pill…

As with most everything, the answer comes from inside. So how do we find passion? I suspect its the same way we find love. We can’t find it outside of us, we don’t just “fall in love”. It is a proactive act that comes from within.

To cultivate passion, intimacy and love it starts from within you. It’s moving from being fear-based to being love-based.

Two examples:

#1. You really want a partner, someone to spend your life with, so you start looking. This shows through and is usually very stifling to others looking for the same thing for themselves. Instead focus on things you are passionate about. Do you have a sport or activity you love? Do you enjoy the arts or have a passion for a specific cause? These are the places you will find your people. When you are partaking in the activities you enjoy, your focus is on something you are passionate about and that shines through. Your passion and focus on what YOU love is what attracts the right people to you.

#2. You are starting a business because you love what you do, but you are fearful you won’t make enough money. Everyone starts here. One of the main things that separates the successes from people that struggle and are living to serve their business is that the successful people don’t make money their main focus. They make their passion, their craft, their connections to others their main focus and it shines through. Then and only then does the money flow.

Passion is an emotion just as fear, sadness, joy, gratitude, hope, or love. It is a positive emotion such as gratitude and joy or elation.

So how do you find your passion? It starts by having com-passion toward yourself.

1. Start taking some notes or journaling. Begin with what you dreamed about and loved to do as a kid; even it is was hula-hooping. That may be the first clue for you that some physical activity or dance is something that you should pursue. Keep going with this; when you write for yourself you bare the roots of what makes you the incredible person you are.

2. Action. Yes, then you need to take some action on what you discovered in #1. Action toward things you desire is the only way to grow your passion.

The objective is to look within for your spark, then act. We don’t just attract passion and it doesn’t happen to us, it happens because of us, from us.

Building passion toward YOU from inside will radiate outward; then you will find what you desire.

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About the JOY Coach

Cheryl Bigus

Cheryl is a personal development coach and mentor who helps women free themselves from hormonal imbalances, weight issues and chronic stress so they can achieve confidence in the way they look and feel without using boot-camp workouts and deprivation diets.

Cheryl takes great joy in helping women unearth their happiness and desires and would love for you to contact her for a free "Frantic to Euphoric" Breakthrough Session. She is a Healthy-Life Coach who can be contacted at and on Facebook.

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