5 Things You Need to Stop Telling Yourself

2013 - 5 Things You Need to Stop Telling Yourself

We all have things that we tell ourselves throughout the day. They can be negative or positive and they can be in response to the good things we’ve done or the mistakes we’ve made.

The problem is that most of the time, the thoughts are negative and tend to be degrading and hurtful. And yet we continue to tell ourselves these things because we foolishly believe they are true.

But thoughts are only thoughts, they do not form anything into stone and they are not permanent. The amazing thing is that we have the power to control our thoughts and change. And when we allow ourselves to change our negative thinking, we in turn can change our whole lives.

Negative self talk is the one of the worst things we can do to ourselves, and still we are all victims of it. The 5 most common phrases that we continue to tell ourselves over and over again are:


  1. I’m not good enough.

Good enough for who? We are already amazing just the way we are in this moment, and we must start believing in this. Who would you be without the thought that you are not good enough?

I would be happy and free.


  1. I’ll never be like them.

Why would you want to be like someone else when you are so perfectly unique and beautiful as you are? There’s no one else like you on this Earth. That is an amazing fact, so why are you continually searching for something else to be?


  1. I’m fat.

Who is telling you that? Are you just ‘feeling’ that way? What lies beneath those thoughts and feelings? Sometimes we use the word ‘fat’ to cover up the real issues. What could be the real problem? Or maybe you just need to accept and love yourself that way you are.


  1. I can’t do it.

This is the worst thing you could ever say because once you declare this, it’s true. You are already believing that you cannot do something, then how will you ever be able to do it?

Start with I can and see what happens.


  1. I’m worthless.

How could you be worthless if you are here? You were born for a reason and that already makes you worthy of so much. Being worthy is a birth right, not a choice or feeling.

You are not worthless.


During my eight year recovery from anorexia nervosa, these types of thoughts were what floated around in my brain 24/7 with no end of stopping in sight. It seemed as though there was no way to break the cycle of these negative thoughts, but there is.

The first step is to recognize them. Start to notice when you say these things to yourself or when these thought appear, write them down.

Once you have a good understanding of these thoughts and maybe some of the reasoning behind them, you can begin to work on eliminating them.

And the best way to do this is to talk back to them. You might feel crazy at first but it works. When a negative thought comes in, fight back to it, disagree with it and replace it with a positive affirmation.

When you say nice things about yourself, your body and mind will thank you and you will be happier inside and out.

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About the JOY Coach

Tayla Anne

Tayla Anne is a writer, jeweler, and artist who has recovered from anorexia nervosa after nine years of struggle. Her blog, She’ll Be Free is a nurturing place where she writes about her experiences and how others can gain freedom through self love and acceptance.

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